Tuesday, March 31, 2020
Monday, March 30, 2020
I thought maybe the older lady I like really does like other people, like my cousin, better in unfair ways but differences that are good too. I know Ellen DeGeneres telepathically said that was her hormones. Adults, like the English did, want to feel sex from people to avoid the people they were on before in certain situations, like if they were considered good before.
People just see my aunt or know and think I don't like looks much, like many, but I like art a lot and was considered very good, too. You know, they think if they compare me to my aunt, it looks like I don't care about my looks as much or don't wish I was a beautiful fairytale princess or something.
I just Googled my cousin.
https://nypost.com/2018/09/14/evil-game-lands-stripper-her-second-arrest-of-the-day/
People think that I'm bad and that all my "best" relationships should go to her and I should suffer for a long time about it, like she deserves more than me because she has a fancy mom, my aunt, and my dad is older and more old-fashioned in nature and not like her.
Even Ellen DeGeneres believes my aunt is bad for making my other aunt watch her and not giving her enough, she informed me or others I thought and am pretty sure in how she dealt with this, through telepathic ways.
I guess my aunt was wrong, not sure how else to break it. She brought her up in the heat, she didn't want her to be like her and she's very attractive, and mostly she promotes her over me it seems or I have nothing to do with people making it so she has some of my most important things socially like relationships, like if it was hard to meet people and I finally found some.
Please don't get a bad impression of her. I think because of my aunt she had a hard life. I was just thinking it was her responsibility to raise her, not blame the world for ruining it. In fact when we talk to people she is nice and people like her better than me rather than like us both in different ways of any shared ways. They think that by getting mad at her, that's the only way to fix life. You know, sometimes they come by my house and sometimes I feel bad around them or a lot. I feel sorry for my sick dad, but he's older. It's interesting my dad is also a violent parent sometimes, like if I ask if something is weird he threatens to throw me out of the house or car, same with my mom.
So, I don't mean to say anything bad about anyone, just like my aunt is confused about her…
If you know the bad point it's the idea that adults try to say I don't deserve anything because it's only my aunt's side that is glamorous.
People think that I'm bad and that all my "best" relationships should go to her and I should suffer for a long time about it, like she deserves more than me because she has a fancy mom, my aunt, and my dad is older and more old-fashioned in nature and not like her.
Even Ellen DeGeneres believes my aunt is bad for making my other aunt watch her and not giving her enough, she informed me or others I thought and am pretty sure in how she dealt with this, through telepathic ways.
I guess my aunt was wrong, not sure how else to break it. She brought her up in the heat, she didn't want her to be like her and she's very attractive, and mostly she promotes her over me it seems or I have nothing to do with people making it so she has some of my most important things socially like relationships, like if it was hard to meet people and I finally found some.
Please don't get a bad impression of her. I think because of my aunt she had a hard life. I was just thinking it was her responsibility to raise her, not blame the world for ruining it. In fact when we talk to people she is nice and people like her better than me rather than like us both in different ways of any shared ways. They think that by getting mad at her, that's the only way to fix life. You know, sometimes they come by my house and sometimes I feel bad around them or a lot. I feel sorry for my sick dad, but he's older. It's interesting my dad is also a violent parent sometimes, like if I ask if something is weird he threatens to throw me out of the house or car, same with my mom.
So, I don't mean to say anything bad about anyone, just like my aunt is confused about her…
If you know the bad point it's the idea that adults try to say I don't deserve anything because it's only my aunt's side that is glamorous.
Sunday, March 29, 2020
Saturday, March 28, 2020
Friday, March 27, 2020
Wednesday, March 25, 2020
Website Update
Old Pictures of Me
link
I lost pictures and videos in Hurricane Katrina in 2005.
link
I lost pictures and videos in Hurricane Katrina in 2005.
me at age 15 or 16
just holding a violin
me at age 16
Tuesday, March 24, 2020
Monday, March 23, 2020
About Going Along Fine
People let you get ahead if you're not as mixed race as others.
If you think you're good at something with your peers and you're more mixed race, people think you're bad showing off, like you should "go to ****," almost literally.
If you think you're good at something with your peers and you're more mixed race, people think you're bad showing off, like you should "go to ****," almost literally.
Limited Access Due to Generation and Race
You know how you only can tell some things if you're a Late Boomer or their Generation YZA kid? Same thing with race in some places apparently, if you don't fit in, like here in Orlando then you can't be amazing because you're also identified and shut out socially in that way. I guess none of you people want to give it a try.
Overly Sensitive and Apologetic, Secretly Competitive - Also Defines the US
What do you think of people who act overly sensitive and apologetic but seem to do it sort of "standing in front of you," like maybe you're still "cool" to others though you're doing things right just without all the weird yet amazing humbled effects applied?
They tend to have light brown hair and brown eyes, no offense to anyone. Just try to get a word in and they won't notice you much unless you're popular...
They tend to have light brown hair and brown eyes, no offense to anyone. Just try to get a word in and they won't notice you much unless you're popular...
I plan to take ballet, again.
A beginning ballet class again, twice a week.
I'm excited...
• long sleeve black leotards
• black ballet slippers (double sole)
• black tights (with opening at bottom of feet)
• black leg warmers (to cover the muscular figure of my legs)
• black wrap around skirt (I tried one stretchable skirt and it rolled up, didn't have a band though I think
• black underwear
• black sports bras with padding
• black elastic band for ponytail, with some hair hanging on the side because it's too short to tie up
• black duffel bag with a shoe compartment and 1/2 wet/dirty section 1/2 dry/clean section
1 reason I am taking it is to stay in shape, too, but I do like it and because it's fun and athletic.
I took gymnastics when I was little, and so I guess in ballet last resort hard to remember steps for me.
I'm excited...
• long sleeve black leotards
• black ballet slippers (double sole)
• black tights (with opening at bottom of feet)
• black leg warmers (to cover the muscular figure of my legs)
• black wrap around skirt (I tried one stretchable skirt and it rolled up, didn't have a band though I think
• black underwear
• black sports bras with padding
• black elastic band for ponytail, with some hair hanging on the side because it's too short to tie up
• black duffel bag with a shoe compartment and 1/2 wet/dirty section 1/2 dry/clean section
1 reason I am taking it is to stay in shape, too, but I do like it and because it's fun and athletic.
I took gymnastics when I was little, and so I guess in ballet last resort hard to remember steps for me.
Reasons Not to Trust Ballet
Young children in modern dance have cuter costumes and more opportunities in the US, such as competition in dance as a group in most any area of the US.
Everything is fun, too.
Some people aren't steered towards a career in any of the arts or at least not in ballet or maybe not dance neither.
Everything is fun, too.
Some people aren't steered towards a career in any of the arts or at least not in ballet or maybe not dance neither.
Mainstream Ballet in the US
A lot of people end up in artistic careers who didn't end up caring for ballet when they were kids. Musicians seem to be getting a lot of respect now. A lot of people regret not doing art when they were younger and do it now. Many people trust the film industry, as well, and become actors. However, doing ballet is what people do to be safe in the US. In Germany, it seems their classical music has surpassed ballet here in the US. In the end, many girls who danced or cheered just use it to be popular after they quit because they are so pumped up and have maybe the hottest figures. Some quit after junior high, whereas some hadn't then yet even begun.
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